ladykatza

So, for those of you that don’t know, I am majoring in International Studies: Global Technology at Southern Polytechnical State University. The main curriculum is here and then I have to choose a concentration. I’ve chosen Tecnology and the Law. Which just happens to have the highest amount of credit hours required.

And is the one I am truly interested in. This is further evidence to me that I must be off my rocker.

OK, so a week and a half into the semester I am already thinking to myself that I’ve bitten off more than I can chew, and OMFG what was I thinking! Then I get a few minute with my husband and he says how much he misses me. This makes me sad. I tell him that I can always quit college, because I would do that for him. His response was “I don’t want you to do that again. Finish up so I can go next.”

*sniff* He loves me so much.

So about this degree. It can very easily lead into a law degree, and when I told my mother this, she said that Grandma had always said I would make a good lawyer. She worked as a legal secretary for 30 years, I think. Grandma said “She’ll walk right in where angels fear to tread and argue with the devil”. She might be right on that note.

Current Mood:  determined

one man created this religion and sent letters to the board asking them to please consider teaching it in schools along with other “alternative creation”.

board members responded with the following.

Current Mood:  amused

i’m tired of studying. i’ve read all my work, i’ve written down key terms, i’ve memorized as much as i’m going to and if i have a pop quiz in psych tomorrow, oh well. i’ll either do well or i won’t. i have a paper due on thursday and i finally got the idea down and i’ve written my outline and it will stand there for now.

so, a week ago today i went to a family reunion for my mother-in-law’s side of the family. she wanted the kids there to play with their multitude of cousins, and i wanted free food. its out at the plant bowen recreational facility and if you’ve never seen a power plant up close (even if its a coal burning one) its really impressive structure to look at. i’d love to take a tour of the place sometime. but i digress…

i had a digital camera with me from my friend Amanda. she gave me her old one after an upgrade and its been fun to use. here are a couple shots i took, they are a bit big, my apologies.

Current Mood: done studying

my medieval world history class has been interesting in the respect that it focuses a great deal on the religions that were predominant in different sections of the world and how they helped shape our society. during my studying the other day i had a thought train that i wrote down during my studying instead of trying to ignore it as i use to do. out of the several paragraphs, which upon re-reading i’ve decided not to post, i had one thought that is mine own and i decided was worth sharing.

Good intentions may have a bad end due to the very human nature that one is trying to change.

Current Mood: collegiate

i worry too much, i know i do. i often lay awake at night worrying about what i shoulda, coulda, needed to do or could have, should have done better. i think that even if everything is OK i would find something to worry about.

my phone interview didn’t go well. i know it didn’t because i was so worked up about not knowing what i needed to know that i forgot what i needed and on occasion even started to bluff my way through but thought better of it. i know i didn’t sound confident for half of it. it was my anxiety and fear of not being good enough.

in my eyes, i’m never good enough, i’m too lazy, i’m not smart enough or pretty enough. well, at least some days. on others i’m great and i get kicked down for being concieted or arrogant. cause, you know, we’re suppose to be humble. especially women, we’re raised that way even when the parents try not to.

so i have issues and i need to get over them. unless i’m paying someone 100 bucks an hour i’m not going to get any sympathy. well, that’s not really true either, i just feel like it is. so, maybe i should just charge myself a hundred bucks for self-therapy.

Current Mood:  anxious

my glasses apparently fell out of my bag at the movie theatre. i’m glad i found them because i was having dreams about losing the silly things last night.

*does the happy dance*

Current Mood:  relieved

Harvard Research Labs have something really cool.

Current Mood:  excited

so i realize that my last posts were more of a disjointed ranting of a person in pain. something about back, head, and any pain dealing with your nervous system makes it very hard to concentrate. the inability to sleep even more disruptive, and top that off with the fact that it was too painful to have sex… well… i’ve pretty much been in a rotten mood for several weeks.

but i’m better now. several weeks and a couple hundred dollars of therapy and i can walk and dance again (sex too, perverts…sheesh). my soon to be non-existent insurance is useless for “alternative care”. oh well, its only money.

so, the good news.

i had my interview. it went OK, but not as well as i would have liked. they did ask me at the end of the interview “the hours are 11-7, would that be a problem if we offered you the job”. i said no. which leads into my next thing. i started school today, and i have a class on monday, wednesday, and friday at that ends at 11am.

see the problem?

ok, so that class is also taught by the head of my department. i talked to her after class, explained to her the situation. not only did she understand she gave me solutions! she said “well, we’ll put you in the saturday class if you get the job, and if you don’t, well, i need someone in our social studies computer lab”. w00t! so, either way i win and i was smiling on the way in to work.

now, if only i could find my reading glasses. i’m hoping they didn’t throw it away after playing with them and breaking them like they did with my badge. granted they told me about the badge and i said “i’m very dissapointed that you broke my badge, but VERY proud that you told me the truth”. i hope that re-inforces that behavior. they also managed to break the door to simon’s bureau upstairs. i’m going to have to take it off its hinges and get some wood glue and some vice clamps to put it back together.

simon has started this new thing the other day. its really funny and cute.

“hey, do you want to see my show?”
“sure simon!”

so after this he walks over and pretends to turn on a switch and then starts dancing and singing. or at least trying to dance, it looks more like funny jerking motions of a beginner marionette.

“manga manga manga pop! manga manga manga hippo! manga manga manga LION! ROAR! manga manga manga dance! ” so then he starts singing the song from Madagascar; “do you like to move it, move it! do you like to move it, move it! manga manga manga daecon! manga manga manga felicity! manga manga manga elizabeth!”

what’s even funnier is felicity is always two seconds behind him. she’s turned into a real copycat, that one. follows him around like a little shadow and does and says everything he does.

Current Mood:  hopeful

Current Music: Satellite - Dave Mathew's Band

i went to the chiropractor again today. i mentioned that i had to go take a math placement test, and he said “for what?”. i explained i was going back to school to get my degree. he said “oh, i always assumed you had one”. which, interestingly enough, is not the first time that i’ve had someone assume that about me. i always take it as a compliment.

Current Mood:  sleepy

i went to my county’s Democratic Comittee meeting on saturday morning. i’ve been bemoaning the fact that something needs to be done, something HAS to be done to keep all my freedoms from slipping away. its also obvious (to me) that its almost impossible to effect anything on a large scale without starting small. i realized that if i want the right to bitch, i better be exercising my right to vote.

i mentioned this to those that came over saturday night, and steve (the eternal pessimist) said “vote your conscious but i’m going to tell you that they aren’t doing anything to help what is going on”

so here’s my rant.

i’m not exactly a democrat, but i’m definately not a republican. since going out on my own and starting a revolution is not an option for me, i’ll join the opposite side. its THE most organized group (which isn’t always saying much) opposing what i don’t like in my local government and its a place to start. nothing gets done by sitting around and bitching about it.

“but if you speak up and write letters they are going to notice you and come after you!”

i want them to notice me. i’m not doing anything wrong, so its not a problem for me. i am a voting member of my party and my taxes pay their salary.* big corporations can lobby for policies, but on a local level, in the long run, my vote counts. THE MAN has too many other things on its plate to come after me.

“you’re wrong! they will come for you eventually”

and if they do, at least i can say i tried. if, in the unlikely event i become worth the time, effort, and money, to single me out i will make sure that its big, ugly, and noisy. but its unlikely because again, i’m not doing anything that’s “against the law” and i don’t have anything of monetary value worth taking.

“and that’s exactly why they won’t pay any attention to you”

please see above paragraph marked with a *

write your representatives, pay attention to local elections and get involved. if you don’t do these things and suddenly you are faced with a law that you don’t like then i’m going to say; sit down and shut the fuck up you pansy ass whiner. you didn’t try to do a damn thing beforehand, so you have no right to bitch now.

and that is all i have to say about that.

Current Mood:  determined

simon: are cats humans?
daecon: no
simon: are cats demons
daecon: no simon, cats are cats because they are cats. that’s why they are called cats.
simon: then how can they lose their mittens?

Current Mood: huh?

so, mom and dad have had this stray kitten hanging around the house the past week or so. its got a collar and obviously a house cat. they don’t want a cat, and we’ve been talking about getting another kitten for the kids. they are old enough now to understand how to take care of it.

so i told the kids that grandma and grandpa were coming up to visit and they have a very special present for both of them. i explained that this present would be one that they would have to take extra special care of and the said OK.

so mom and dad get here and oh boy are they excited. i said that they can name the cat, and simon says “his name is manga!”

uh… manga? are you sure?

felicity and simon chime in MANGA!!!

*facepalm*

i’m not even sure if my kids know that manga is the name of an anime distributor. well, i know they don’t know. people think we’re strange for a reason.

so, after several hours of this new kitten being extremely tolerant of being carted around in a very undignified manner, the kids go to bed and bailong comes in. the meeting of the old cat to the new cat. not sure how this is going to go. currently bailong is sitting behind my computer staring intently at manga who is curled up against the wall next to the TV. its a mexican stand off. any moment now one of them is going to charge and that will be the end of it.

or they may just go to sleep. who knows.

so, besides the new kitten, my back is much better and i’m able to bend over at the waist and pick up objects up to 15 pounds instead of nothing at all. its mostly just sore muscles instead of a pinched disk now.

i think i’ll do a separate post for the rest of the strange things my family has said throughout the day. some of it was just too odd.

Current Mood: bemused

This comes from Neil Gaiman’s blog, and the word is to spread the word. Sixteen authors are auctioning off a nameplace in their books and all proceeds will go to benefit The First Amendment Project.

Even if you don’t have a great sum of money to use for the auction, you can still donate to the cause.

i have a phone interview. its an interview with a company i _very_ much want to work for and i’m nervous. i’m also excited, and its put me in a better mood than i’ve been in for a while.

i’ve been reflecting on my life of late, and i realize that in our day and age when it seems to be the rule of thumb for parents to protect their children too much i have had more experiences than most. while my childhood was not exceptionally hard, i had some unique variables that gave me a more mature outlook than many my age.

i wasn’t told drinking was bad. i was told drinking and driving was bad. i was told to drink at home, or stay where i was. i’ll never forget the look on one of my friend’s faces when i called my parents to say that i was staying there because i couldn’t drive home. this didn’t happen often, but on the few occasions that it did i wasn’t in trouble. the few times i woke up at home with a hangover Dad seemed to have some need to fix something in the house that required really loud power tools.

i learned to nurse hangovers elsewhere.

whatever it is in my personality, i take big bites out of life and make big mistakes. the upside of this is that i make them early and correct them when i’m still young. the things i have been depressed about happen to everyone and i am not unique in this situation. but when it happens to yourself, it feels like it.

Current Mood: reflective

*jumps and down for joy despite her back aching*

i’m going to kiss datavortex next time i see him.

Current Mood:  giddy

Current Music: Death of Jack the Ripper -Legendary Pink Dots

i went back to the chiropractor today. although i am still sore and hobbling, he did me a great deal of good. its more of an achy recovering pain instead of the “someone is stabbing me in the back with a knife i wanna cry” pain. he told me that he hadn’t been so concerned for a patient in years and he can only recall telling a patient five times that “if x happens, go directly to the emergency room”.

if the stereo-typically granola-crunchy type doctors tell you to go to the emergency room, it can’t be good.

simon’s birthday. i’ve been so distracted i haven’t even mentioned this. it was very small, and i wanted to have a big party for this friends to come to. alas, i failed once again to pull this off. the fact that i did anything seemed a miracle to me. i did get him a bunch of geo-trax to put together what now looks a bit like a roller coaster. he’s thrilled with them, and i’m sure he’ll start playing with them as soon as he gets home from grandmother’s.

of course, our friends and family would say “happy birthday simon” when they see him. simon says “its not my birthday anymore”. its funny the way he says it and the looks at you intently after saying “happy BELATED birthday simon”.

i have the blinds open and i’m looking out onto the backyard and listening to the thunder rumble. i’m thinking i need to go lay down again.

Current Mood:  sore

my back is getting better, so that’s good at least. i was able to walk around the store yesterday, and in fact, walking helps. its waking up first thing in the morning and trying to move that it hurts the most. today i took some serious pain medication and a co-worker picked me up so i could drive his car back. that was a serious test of pain tolerance. blech…

so its raining and the neighborhood girls are out doing a re-enactment of “singing in the rain”. well, probably not, i doubt they’ve ever seen that movie. either way, its young and nubile girls running around in the rain and that always draws attention. i remember playing in the rain when i was young and just how fun it was.

i have fuzzy brain. fuzzy brain is when you try to formulate thoughts but it feels like your filtering them through cheesecloth and they are just a little too lumpy. maybe if you concentrate hard enough you’ll grasp the complete thought and string it together in some coherent sentence that someone outside your head can understand.

so… it is in that state i go and take a nap.

Current Mood: fuzzy brained

i did something to my back, and i can’t for the life of me figure out what it was. did i pick something up wrong? sex in an akward position? i haven’t a clue. i know its an old injury flaring up. see, about a week after my birthday a year ago i was carrying felicity down the stairs in my arms. she wasn’t quite big enough to make down the stairs on her own. i tripped on something and fell. i could have saved myself, but dropped my baby. obviously, i took the brunt of it. its sucked ever since.

but i haven’t had pain this bad since i had induced labour with felicity. walking makes me want to cry. i walk with this sort of crooked shuffle that makes me thing i’m practicing to be a zombie in a movie. i couldn’t feel my right foot.

well, i went to the chiropractor and he did everything he could and it hurts more. apparently, this is a good thing because it means i have feeling back again. *grimace* i’m suppose to go back monday. i had to call my boss and tell him i was requesting the time off and why. he is not happy, said that he’d get a wheelchair and come pick me up if he has to. i laughed and said if he went through all that effort, who am i to argue?

Pain just showed up with a bottle of chianti and food. so i’m out of here for now.

Current Mood:  uncomfortable

so, despite my terribly aching back i went down to my mom and dad’s house today. they have a jack russell terrier named daisy.

now, felicity is a little drama queen at times and she’ll bump her knee and start crying
“i want a band-aid!” which really is just her trying to get attention. but today after she started doing this she said;

felicity: daisy has an owie!
my mom looking concerned: oh no, really? where!
felicity: under her tail!!

Current Mood: hurting

i just finished a to-do list, a few of which i had been putting off for a while. one of which, well, V, you’re going to be getting a package in about 4-6 weeks. i was too cheap to send it air-mail.

i went to the county clerk’s office to get official records of our name change, went to the post office, the college, the toy store for simon’s bd presents, and to the grocery store for a birthday cake. i was too lazy to bake one. oh, and i stopped by the asian grocery to get miso soup for simon. he loves that stuff.

and i forgot the catfood, so bailong gets tuna to tide her over. i haven’t heard her purr that loud in a long time. i just scared her out the door after using a folder to kill a ginormous flying insect of some sort.

i need to take the car in for its routine maintenance, call a bunch of people about monetary stuff, and put together some cover letters for a few resumes i’m sending out.

my cousin Maren is now in japan as part of the J.E.T. program. its a japanese/english teaching exchange and she’s very excited. i can’t wait to hear about it and find out if her experiences might be anything like this guys.

well, that’s all for the moment. i’m going to go take a 15 minute power nap and then get back to work.

Current Mood:  busy